You tell, dating and god really. happens. Let's
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In relationships you are to lead each other to Christ. You are to chase Christ together. If you get into a relationship with an ungodly person they will slow you down.
5 Dating Tips - Pastor Steven Furtick
Run to Christ and whoever is keeping up with you introduce yourself. Not only are you to lead each other by the way you live your life, but you have to worship together.
In a relationship you both are going to learn from each other, but the woman takes the submissive role and the man takes the leadership role. You will regret it.
Are you pursuing them for godly reasons? I am not saying that you should not be attracted to the person who you are dating because you should be.
If God blesses you with a very beautiful godly woman or handsome man that is OK, but looks are not everything. If you are looking for a supermodel you must know that extreme pickiness is not good and also there is a strong chance that you are not a supermodel. No one is if you remove all the editing and makeup.
Sometimes the woman is Christian, but she is unsubmissive and contentious. What to look for in a godly man? Take this into consideration. Is he a man? Is he growing into a man? Does he want to be a leader? Look for godliness because a husband is to one day be your spiritual leader. Look for his love for the Lord and the advancement of His kingdom. Is he seeking to bring you towards Christ?
Does he work hard? Does he have godly and respectable goals? Can he handle money well? Is he generous? Is he living in godliness and seeking to obey the Word? Is God working in his life and making him more like Christ?
Does he have a strong prayer life? Does he pray for you? Is he honest? Does he seek to take your purity? How does he treat others? Is he violent? By guarding it according to your word.
What to look for in a godly woman? Has she surrendered her life to the Lord? Does she allow you to lead? Is she submissive? Does she seek to build you up and help you with what God has for you? Does she constantly nag and belittle you? Is she clean? Is her house and car always messy? That is going to be your house. Is she pressuring you to have sex with her? Does she dress sensually, run if she does.
Does she respect her father? Is she seeking to be a virtuous woman? Is she contentious? Is she lazy? Can she run a household? Does she fear God? Is she a prayer warrior? Is she trustworthy? In this way they will train the younger women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be self-controlled, pure, fulfilling their duties at home, kind, being subject to their own husbandsso that the message of God may not be discredited.
She selects wool and flax and works with willing hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from far away. She rises while it is still night and provides food for her household and portions for her female servants.
She evaluates a field and buys it; she plants a vineyard with her earnings. She draws on her strength and reveals that her arms are strong. She sees that her profits are good, and her lamp never goes out at night. She extends her hands to the spinning staff, and her hands hold the spindle. Her hands reach out to the poor, and she extends her hands to the needy. She is not afraid for her household when it snows, for all in her household are doubly clothed. She makes her own bed coverings; her clothing is fine linen and purple.
She makes and sells linen garments; she delivers belts to the merchants. Strength and honor are her clothingand she can laugh at the time to come. In order to fully grasp the many principles that apply to dating, courtship, engagement and marriage, much foundation must first be laid. Be patient with the need to establish the right framework.
It is essential to appreciating-to truly comprehending -all that follows. While it does contain, later in the book, a great many specific points for application, these latter chapters simply cannot be properly applied without first understanding the vital backdrop of the preceding chapters.
A word to parents and teens: Parents, this book can be absolutely invaluable to you in training and preparing your children throughout the years preceding the eligible age of marriage-if you use it! Teenagers, this book will also guide you -and will protect you from endless, and usually unseen, traps and pitfalls. Read it. Study it. Adhere to it. You will be enormously glad you did! Why do you need to learn more about dating and courting?
Is there a right and wrong way of dating or, like learning to walk or ride a bike, can people just naturally figure it out as they experience it? But how can I say this? All you need do is look at the astonishing array of ill effects in millions of relationships to realize that the dating and courtship practiced today are far off-track.
But, before we address this, the principle of cause and effect must be explained.
Most do not recognize that for every cause there is an effect -or, conversely, for every effect there is a cause. Nor do they know that this is a law. Scientists recognize this in physics, but society is unaware that the same is true in life-that the law of cause and effect is no less immutable than any law of science.
Some simple examples:. If you routinely eat too much, what happens? You will become sick or overweight-or both! There is no mystery to this. If you drink too much alcohol, you will become intoxicated. This could lead to a long list of bad effects: A next-day headache, being arrested, or even an auto accident resulting in injury or death to yourself or others.
Again, there is no mystery here. This will hurt your family, your career opportunities and your entire future. Once again, no mystery to this. In this fashion, the law of cause and effect directly impacts your life-and the life of everyone on earth. The ways that this happens are endless. If industry pollutes the environment, the result is contaminated air or water, or even the much-debated problem of global warming.
If countries go to war, the results-the effects-are economic upheaval, disease, famine and general misery for all involved.
If parents neglect the proper rearing of their children, or if children do not obey their parents, the effects could be poor performance in school, drug addiction, criminal conduct or worse. The Bible contains hundreds of laws and principles, each carrying the power of cause and effect for those who keep -or break -them! Whether one identifies and knows all the laws and principles of the Bible is not relevant to whether breaking them will bring certain punishment. Just as speeding can result in a ticket, whether the driver knew the speed limit or not, so those who break the laws of God reap penalties, whether they know they are violating specific laws or not.
Look at the world around you. It is littered with broken families, unhappy marriages, single-parent homes, STDs, astonishing ignorance and widespread misery.
Have you ever asked why? WHY has mankind never been able to solve these and other great problems? Why do they only grow worse with the passing of time? Again, consider the basic understanding of cause and effect. But mankind has routinely rejected-and even lampooned-the instruction book that reveals the cause of all its problems, evils and ills.
So how does the law of cause and effect apply to dating and courtship? Where do these practices lead? The answer is simple. Dating, and the courtship that may ensue, are the precursors to relationships-and ultimately marriages.
The effect-successful or failed marriages-is what results from either right or wrong forms of dating and courtship. The cause-and-effect principle goes both ways. For every cause, there is a resulting effect, and for every effect, there is a traceable cause!
We could ask: Are they good? To determine whether the dating practiced today is correct, we should first examine its fruits. In other words, we must analyze the effects of dating today. If the effects are bad or rotten, then we should be able to admit that something is wrong, possibly very wrong, with the cause-the ways that people in society practice dating, courtship and even engagement. Therefore, it is essential to examine the overall state of the marriage institution.
If dating and courtship are being done properly, we should expect the general condition of marriage throughout society today to be healthy.
Greater numbers of people are questioning the institution of marriage every day. Many are concerned with the direction of current trends. Some ponder whether marriage can even survive. All of this would have been unthinkable just 50 years ago. Entire communities -and nations -functioned on this premise!
If dating and courtship were practiced correctly today, they would form the foundation of a beautiful relationship between a husband and wife as God ordained it. The two would spend a lifetime together enjoying much happiness and joy. This God-plane relationship would include expanding the family to children who would experience more productive and abundant lives, because their home and family would provide a strong, positive environment, capable of nurturing them to adulthood and into their own successful marriages with children.
Parents would teach children all they need to know, and the process would continue through successive generations. Today it does! This is because modern society is shot full of wrong education, misinformation, hollow opinions, pop psychology, ignorance, bad advice-or no advice-all of which virtually prevents young people from having any hope for true happiness in marriage.
Dating: How Do You Develop a Relationship God's Way?
While shocking, this is only the briefest thumbnail-a very tiny sampling-of all that could have been included. Take the time to consider the enormous implications of these statistics. Make them personal, and imagine the individual lives behind them:.
About half of all marriages fail! How can this be? Try to imagine the pain, suffering and frustration that so many experience. Is there a reason for all of this? Is it merely because many people just cannot get along? But divorce is not the only sad and shocking effect of wrong dating and courtship. Improper dating and courtship practices carry the side effect of leading the large and growing ranks of wounded, jaded, cynical people to decide to just live together-or, more accurately, share a bed together-instead of committing to marriage.
Consider just these statistics from Britain: Inthere werecouples who chose to marry. Byless than three decades later, onlyweddings took place, even though the population had grown by seven percent. Inthe number of UK marriages fell toa stunning decrease of ten percent compared to -this drop in just one year. Just sincethe number of women choosing to cohabitate has more than double going from 13 to 28 percent. The figures for men are only slightly lower.
CHRISTIAN DATING Dating: God's Best or All the Rest? By Belinda Elliott marionfoaleyarn.com Senior Producer. marionfoaleyarn.com - Sure, maybe he's not Prince Charming, but he's a good guy. I know he loves me, I just wish he'd treat me better sometimes. Jan 02, Question: "What does the Bible say about dating / courting?" Answer: Although the words "courtship" and "dating" are not found in the Bible, we are given some principles that Christians are to go by during the time before marriage. The first is that we must separate from the world's view on dating because God's way contradicts the world's (2 Peter ). Dec 27, Though the Bible doesn't talk directly about dating, it does speak volumes about relationships, godly interactions and principles that can be applied to how you date. 1 Corinthians reminds us that no matter what it is we're doing; it can be used as a means to glorify God.
Correspondingly, in America, the number of unmarried couples cohabiting increased tenfold from to Cohabitation is not the only bad side effect resulting from divorce. It is important to stop and look at the children-the most painful fruits-of these failed marriages.
Again, you will be shocked by the far-reaching implications of the telling statistics below, describing the United States, and reflecting the disintegrating fabric of what is considered the most powerful nation in the world:.
Will your children, or future children, become statistics? Will they suffer in uncounted ways? Will you wait until you experience all the wrong effects of improperly dating, courting and preparing for marriage before addressing the gaping wounds you and your children will experience? Or will you deal with the cause now - before it is too late? Over half of all first marriages today are preceded by cohabitation, compared to virtually none in the early part of the twentieth century, just years ago.
Young adults now so often postpone marriage until their late 20s to early 30s. While most men and women are choosing to establish themselves in jobs and careers before marriage which can be goo they also most often spend a long period unmarried but sexually active.
Yet, looking at destroyed marriages, wounded children and broken families does not paint the full picture of the effects of wrong dating habits today. Sadly, dating today directly leads -almost universally-to premarital sex. Millions do this. So many, blinded by pure lust, are committing fornication as a veritable way of life! Surrounded by illicit sex on every side, and often guided solely by their hormones-and what the dating partner almost certainly expects -rather than by what is right, couples routinely commit every kind of sexual sin imaginable.
And many do this without the slightest pang of conscience giving them pause. Within minutes, often induced by a variety of drugs, alcohol and an unwholesome environment, young people unconsciously reject the possibility of a healthy, fulfilling, God-ordained and designed wonderful relationship of husband and wife.
Instead, they choose to dive into mindless, instant gratification, giving little or no consideration for the devastating long-term effects they will surely experience. A single shocking previously mentioned statistic brings this trend to the forefront: One-third of all children in the United States today are born out of wedlock! Think what this means! One out of every three children now begins life without a proper family and lacking the environment that the Almighty Creator designed and intended.
Breaking this down, we can begin to understand the compounding trouble afflicting most families today. What happens to all those in our generation who have lost even the most basic knowledge of how to have a happy, abundant marriage? What will happen another generation from now? While statistics reveal that teenagers from intact families are less likely to be sexually active, adolescents from broken families are twice as likely to have children out of wedlock.
The effects of dating habits yesterday have caused horrible conditions in countless lives todayand the trend can only grow worse for greater numbers tomorrow! Relationship destruction spreads like an infection, like cancer, making it easier for others to follow bad examples and take the easy way out themselves. The tragic end result is that divorce and ruined lives breed more divorce and more ruined lives.
On the present path, this worsening trend would continue until the marriage institution and the entire concept of traditional families are irreversibly destroyed-except that God will soon intervene in the affairs of mankind and cut short the downward spiral before such extinction is permitted to happen!
Vast numbers of marriages have needlessly failed. This has been because couples were not taught in advance how to carefully select someone who could be a real companion-and a truly compatible partner-for life. Divorce resulted simply because there never should have been a marriage in the first place.
Of course, many other marriages fail because couples who could have otherwise succeeded simply did not know how to make their marriage work-a very different problem, and one largely outside the parameters of this book. But no marriage can reach its full and wonderful potential, and could possibly even fail altogether, if singles either do not know what to look for in a prospective mate, or even that they should be thoroughly examining those whom they are dating seriously.
When most people carefully look at the effects we have discussed, they will admit that they are real-and that something is terribly wrong! Tragically, these same people often remain unwilling to believe that all these bad effects could have resulted from wrong causes!
Will you examine these causes? Will you come to understand and accept the principles of proper dating, courtship and engagement? Before these things can be discussed-and we will do this in great detail in later chapters-we must carefully lay the all-important foundationso crucial to truly comprehend all that you will only then be prepared to learn. However, before we can understand how they are wrong, we must ask why this confused state of affairs.
Why are so many people unable to correctly date, court, and reap the benefits of a happy marriage and family life? To fully grasp the reason the masses do not follow sound principles of dating and courtship, we must learn the underpinnings of society as a whole. The big picture must be examined. Almost 6, years ago, the first man and woman were created.
As Chief Designer of marriage, God also explained this relationship to them, and the laws that govern it. Touching on the high points, a summary of this account is found in the earliest chapters of Genesis.
What is clear is that God taught this first couple His Way-the way that would bring peace, supreme happiness, abundance, prosperity and all the good things of life.
Yet, because of His infinite Purpose, God created these first human beings as free moral agents. Adam and Eve had the power to choose. God did not force His way of life on them, but rather taught them the right way, leaving the choice to them as to what they would do.
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Genesis 3 records what happened in the garden with Satan tempting Eve. There were two special trees in the garden. Adam and Eve were instructed to eat as much from this tree as they wished.
God-and God alone-decides what sin is. Man was not given the authority to decide what sin is but rather only whether he would sin. Adam and Eve had a clear choice!
From that day forward, mankind has been cut off from God, having rejected God and His ways Isa. Therefore, all but a select few couples lack the supreme happiness and joy that God intended for every marriage! Any mixture of good and evil is always fatal!
If one mixes even a small amount of arsenic or cyanide into a cake, it will still just as surely kill those who eat it. Most assume that this world belongs to and is guided by God-that civilization as a whole is being supervised by Him.
Is this true? We must ask, who is the real ruler over this world? The serpent deceived Eve, starting mankind down the path away from God and His Law.
Open your Bible and read these plain verses. Astonishing, but true-and most will never accept this statement, or that it could apply to themselves, much less that it could have any bearing on their dating practices. How are you cut down to the ground, which did weaken the nations! For you have said in your heart, I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God: I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north: I will ascend above the heights of the clouds: I will be like the Most High.
Ezekiel parallels and reinforces Isaiah 14 and is equally important to understand. While of great intelligence, he has literally become insane-a being who no longer knows right from wrong! The devil repeatedly tempted Christ by twisting scripture one of his favorite devices. In a moment, we will see that this stunning event reveals more than meets the eye! Notice that Christ rebuked Satan vs. Also notice! Therefore, He rejected the terms for receiving them from the one-Satan-who had the authority to offer them.
Stop and consider the implications here. This world, with its ways and systems, is under the control of the devil! How can the devil deceive over six and a half billion people?
They assist Satan in his work of mass deception. It has to be one or the other! Deceived people practice lives filled with sin.
Recall Isaiah For our purposes here, continue to view these passages in relation to the process of how people are influenced to date, court and select marriage partners. These statements wound human pride, but not as much as remaining in deception wounds those who permit this.
If one cannot accept Revelation as coming directly from the mind of God, any hope of breaking free of this awful deception will be lost! Such people will have chosen to remain under their captor for the remainder of the age. Can It Be Proven? This Book is the most misrepresented, misinterpreted, misunderstood book of all time. Yet, it can be proven to be the plain Word of God!
Now consider the following vital scripture. This is a fascinating passage, with the thought continuing at the end of verse 3. Again notice Ephesians In a manner of speaking, Satan owns the largest radio station on earth, broadcasting 24 hours a day, reaching and deceiving the entire world! Are you beginning to see from where the preoccupation with merely dating for sex comes-why so many singles seem to have so little else on their minds?
At this point, some vital understanding is necessary before continuing. A Christian obeys God, through His Law. Paul recorded that God has a spiritual law Rom. Christians keep it. True Christians understand and practice- fulfill -its meaning. This Spirit helps Christians obey the Ten Commandments! Consider the design of all angels. The Bible explains that these beings do exist and that they are on a higher plane than men. Although angels invariably manifest themselves as men, they are neither male nor female, and are therefore without sex.
The devil-a fallen angel -is also sexless. He has no ability to reproduce himself and is completely unable to experience the marriage and family relationship, including sexual relations, made available to human beings! He resents the marriage institution. It is therefore in his interest to twist and pervert the institutions of marriage and the family. In contrast, God has given human beings the marvelous ability to reproduce. In the correct atmosphere of a wholesome family, this brings unparalleled joy and happiness.
And, as parents rear their children correctly, those children will grow up to be wonderful parents themselves. Grasp this all-important truth.
Two and a half years later, my life has changed: In the course of nine months, I began dating, became engaged to and married the man I believe God chose for me. In light of what has happened since I wrote these posts, I believe even more resolutely that God orders our steps in the journey toward marriage. Mar 31, The great prize in dating is not Christ-centered intimacy, but Christ-centered clarity. And seven other principles for Christian dating. It's Not You, It's God. Nine Lessons for Breakups. Breakups in the church are painful. Here are lessons for loving others in the heartbreak. 10 Questions on Dating with Matt Chandler. Apr 26, How to Have a God Centered Dating Relationship. If you're trying to live your life in a way that honors God, it's only natural that you'd want a dating relationship that honors Him as well. To ensure God is an important part of your 81%(20).
Satan can never experience the wonderful blessings that God has given to mankind. Hence, the catastrophic mess the family has become through his influence. Recall the awful statistics listed in Chapter One. Brilliant in intelligence, Satan understands the law of cause and effect. He knows that to ultimately defeat the fulfillment of happy marriages and families-and to destroy the values of children and teens before they reach the age of marriage-he must begin at the cause.
One way he does this is by attacking the foundation -right dating and courtship! For 6, years, the devil has been relentless in guiding mankind off track.
All that you see around you today-your community, your country and every institution within them-have faulty foundations. These are all humanly-devised institutions and ideas, created and developed by men under the sway of the devil. Take a hard look at the world around you. Search your local newspaper. Visit the magazine section of any large bookstore.
Scan through television channels. At best, most of what you will see is semi-lewd, and filled with an emphasis on physical beauty, excess, grossness of culture and driven by lust. These are the influences-with powerful messages-that are competing for your attention, and the attention of young people moving toward the dating age.
Recognizing them sets the stage for understanding their effect on the modern dating culture. It is as though they want to reflect a culture that is trapped in an endless cycle of poverty, violence and hopelessness.
Others fill their lives with endless parties, including parties after the parties, all the while pouring a virtual pharmacy of drugs-often on top of alcohol-into their systems. Needless to say, the large majority of singles are left completely umarionfoaleyarn.comepared to choose lifelong mates or to understand what such relationships mean if they found one.
Also observe any music-award television show. Notice how so many in the audience wear tight-fitting, virtually painted-on outfits that are flashy and attention-getting. They reveal parts of the body that were meant to be concealed, and often make those wearing them look like aliens from outer space!
Yet, almost an entire generation has come to consider such garish dress and outlandish behavior to be normal-even chic and fashionable. Next, notice the way people walk, especially in the inner cities. Worse, however, is that endless television commercials explicitly promote this culture by a daily bombardment of an entire generation of young people who are watching-and copying what they see. The almost endless-and outrageously crude-sexually suggestive beer commercials alone tell you this.
Then listen to how people speak. Take a look at mainstream entertainment and media. Never mind what God thinks, or what His standards are. Most want more extramarital sex, more violence, more blurring of the lines between good and evil, less morality, less common sense, less decency, and the promotion of situational ethics instead of having to choose between right and wrong.
Desperate to show how sophisticated their tastes are, many embrace the world of independent films-a subculture of absolute sickness and depravity passing itself off as intellectually fashionable. The music, dance, dress, language, books, plays, conduct and other trends that are underground and cutting edge today invariably become mainstream tomorrow.
Across college campuses, and in high school and middle school hallways, the air is charged with sexual tension, mixed with peer pressure and bad judgment. More and more early-teenage girls are adopting the trend of having a casual lesbian relationship with a school friend on the side, while simultaneously-and actively -remaining heterosexual. So many have gone from periodically visiting the sewer to living in a cesspool-and the cycle of perversion will continue and grow worse, until this world mirrors the times of Noah and of Sodom and Gomorrah Luke This is the world you live in-and it is trying to instill in you every wrong principle of dating and courtship.
Before the invention of radio, his power-as arch broadcaster and prince of the power of the air-could not be as easily understood.
Now you can comprehend! Satan broadcasts a spirit of disobedience -through attitudes-into humanity. Ephesians is plain. But a deceived world knows nothing of this understanding! If you listen to radio, you usually select a station that plays what you desire to hear.
Eventually, something interests them, and they stop at a station of their choosing. In every case, stations are selected by choice. People have control over what they hear or watch.
And no one ever sets out to be deceived! It becomes their nature-now human nature! It is critical to realize how this spirit works in people.
It is the single greatest key to understanding exactly how Satan can deceive and manipulate so many billions of people. Although we now understand that human nature comes from Satan, we must also understand that it is not inherited -but rather acquired! A parent who loses an eye, hand or leg does not produce children having only one eye, one hand or one leg.
They were created on the sixth day of the week Fridayrested on the Sabbath Saturdayand were seduced by Satan Gen. No two-day-old child can discern right from wrong. Like so many young people, Adam and Eve just thought they were grown-up enough to make their own decisions.
Think of it this way. Again, like most children today, Adam and Eve chose not to listen to their Parent, God. Paul was writing to people who lived 4, years after Adam and Eve. He recognized that the devil was still alive and active. Once called and converted, having received the Spirit of God, one has put off the old human nature of his past life. Think for a moment. Human nature is acquired -and this puts people under the wrath of God!
The following is the same scripture from the Phillips translation of the New Testament edition. It better describes how all people have acquired human nature from Satan-and the influence driving all modern social practices.
How true! Take time to read it, possibly using the Moffatt translation of the Bible. With the understanding of Satan the devil, society and self, one must realize the great danger we all face.
Step back and recognize the pulls that have affected you throughout your life. Realize that you live in a world completely devoid of the right way and therefore unable to produce happy, successful marriages. Realize that you have absorbed many ideals-and perspectives-of the world around you. These have conditioned you to assume the characteristics and values-the nature-of society.
Combining Satan and society with human nature creates a dangerous, explosive situation, especially in regard to dating. Everyone understands the crime of forgery. For example, if one is going to make twenty-dollar bills, it would make no sense to produce forgeries that will not be accepted. If you want to counterfeit Christianity, you would not offer Buddhism.
You offer something that looks, feels and seems to be Christianity. It must appear to be Christianity to the undiscerning eye. The Bible describes three forms of real -true- love. To confuse and trap the unsuspecting, the devil has produced counterfeits to these, which, among other things, form a faulty foundation for dating today. Various definitions and misconceptions about love abound. Some feel that it is devotion, others feel that it is sexual passion, and still others feel that it is affection.
Then there are those who feel that it is adoration, or respect, or caring, or admiration or even warm feelings.
Dating and god
Still others see it in poetic terms-or as a mystery that cannot be explained. The problem is that so many initially felt that a relationship was right, when it was not. Society often bases its values on the opinions of the least-qualified voices-those of the entertainment industry. Is it the same as lust? Tough question. There are many different kinds of love-romantic, parental, platonic. Mostly, love is feeling emotionally attached to another person. You want to be close to that person.
You want to share things with her, understand her and have her understand you. You want to care for her and have her care for you. Romantic love usually comes with a strong physical or sexual attraction. You want to hold, touch and sometimes become sexual with that person.
Lust can sometimes turn into love. Often, when two people are first getting together, they have a really strong physical connection. When two people fall in love, lust may fade over time but it is replaced with a deeper, more intimate emotional connection. Usually, time tells. This definition certainly sounds nice.
Everyone wants to be close, to share, to understand and to care for another person. All of this appeals to the listener or reader because many of these are good qualities. As a result, they offer opinions that are a mix of right and wrong. This idea of love is a classic mixture of good and evil. Remember, Adam and Eve chose the knowledge of good and evil. The kind of good described in this way of life, however, is primarily selfish. People generally do good things because they expect something in return.
In short, they give to get. However, close scrutiny will expose the counterfeit-the common misconceptions-and lead you to understand true love. Sadly, many spend entire lifetimes looking for true love but never finding it. Society is missing the vital dimension of knowledge that would make it clear to them. Do you understand what true love is?
Or, are you willing to accept the fact that the world and your own nature have conditioned you to only think you do?
Remember that what seems right can lead to disaster Prov. The difference between true love and infatuation requires honest examination. Therefore, in one sense, people who have become infatuated might be considered fools! However, few would admit that the choices they make are foolish, and fewer still would ever consider themselves to be fools. Because they ignore the signs of infatuation. This is dangerous thinking, often ingrained into children beginning as early as kindergarten!
Infatuation can involve very powerful attraction. Never underestimate it. While it stirs up the emotions and feelings that make couples think they are in love, infatuation is nothing more than a starry-eyed experience-a romantic daydream.
But, at this point in a relationship, it is nearly impossible to convince anyone of this. Reason and logic seem to magically disappear as people feel they are going through a wonderful, even divine, experience that will last forever. All of this understanding is of no use if one cannot recognize the beginnings of infatuation.
How then can you know if you are becoming infatuated? The biggest symptom of infatuation is an almost complete reliance on emotions-to the exclusion of almost everything else about a person-allowing these emotions to first lead, and then dictate, your actions. In the earliest stages of a relationship, ask yourself the following questions:. What is your major attraction to the person?
If infatuated, your main interest will almost certainly be physical appearance. How did the attraction begin? While infatuation almost invariably happens quickly, love always develops more slowly. How consistent is your interest? Infatuation is like a rollercoaster ride-rising and falling, often on trivial events, fluctuating between high peaks of certainty and deep valleys of doubt.
Infatuation involves feelings, comparable to hot and extreme, while love involves character, reflecting balance and temperance. How do you see the other person? The infatuated live in a one-person world. During this stage of infatuation, many become blind, rendered almost completely unable to see anything wrong with the other person. While danger signals might be everywhere, the infatuated person does not recognize them- any of them.
He tends to see what he wants to see rather than what he needs to see. Consider this: Studies reveal that no more than two percent of people counseling for marriage will even consider that they may be incompatible.
Even fewer heed counsel urging them to actually break it off. God wants all of our relationships to be healthy ones, from our friendships to our marriages. Nearly everyone desires to one day have a close, secure and loving relationship with someone who is willing to be a partner for life. It is a desire built into humanity by our Creator, and such a relationship can provide some of the most satisfying and fulfilling elements of a happy life.
But getting to the point of making a lifelong commitment can be anything but easy. An often confusing array of emotions, personalities, hopes, dreams and spiritual principles must be worked through before one can enter into a happy and stable marriage.
Today this journey generally involves a process called dating. The term dating, however, means different things to different people, particularly across generational lines.
Parents and grandparents may have one perspective, while younger people may have a very different view. What does a young adult need to do? There was a time when dating might have been seen as a purely social gathering that could even include multiple people-sometimes called a group date. Whether in a group or just a couple, dates were generally seen as a casual time spent getting to know one another and enjoying the time together.
Topics On Dating: How Do You Develop a Relationship God's Way? Single and Faithful "Faithful" isn't a word that we immediately associate with being single, yet it's one of the most important words of all! Premarital Counseling. Marriage is one of the biggest decisions we'll make. Jan 08, If you haven't consulted God about it that means that you haven't asked Him if the person you have met is the person He wants you to marry. Christian dating does not consist of casual dating, which is unbiblical. This type of dating will leave you broken and all over the place and I'm not even talking about sex. Dating and Courtship God's Way by David C. Pack Countless millions of shattered families began with wrong dating habits. These habits made proper courtship impossible. And the results have been tragic. The almost universal effects of modern dating demonstrate widespread ignorance, even on the most basic points of right dating.
A date did not necessarily indicate any kind of commitment or exclusiveness and did not sanction sexual involvement. The hope was that dating would eventually lead to a closer, loving relationship of mutual respect that would, in time, bring a couple to the point of marriage.
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